KH Accidents

[Blade]

Basically, it's bunch of short stores that I made it up for kicks. First up is...

Dodge Roll Accident

Kairi sat under a tree so she could get some shade and study her schoolbooks. Ever since her adventure with Riku and Sora, her homework had been piling up and she’s almost failing. Then a wooden sword stabbed through her book and was ripped out of her hand.
“Take this!” Sora yelled at Riku. “Strike Wave!”
“Strike what?” Riku said. “You mean ‘Strike Raid’?”
“No, it’s my new skill!” Sora pulled back his hand far and let loose five wooden swords, side-by-side, at Riku.
“Tch, that’s impossible.” Riku managed to block two swords but he was struck by the others.
“Ahaha! How’d you like that? Now I three points!” Sora laughed happily but a wooden sword fell out of his pants. Then another and another and another.
“Dang it, Sora, you cheated!” Riku roared as he charged Sora.
“There was never a rule to not have more than five weapons,” Sora yelled back. Then he rolled away to dodge an attack but he screamed in pain.
“Hey, Sora? What happened,” Riku asked but he was still on guard.
“My back suddenly feels like it’s on fire,” Sora moaned.
Kairi saw Sora on the ground and went towards the two. “Geez, even without keyblades you guys still destroy each other.”
“I didn’t do anything,” Riku said defensively. “Monkey boy here just started having back pain.”
“Dang it, just heal me!” Sora snapped.
“Alright, alright. Cura!” A light surrounded Sora for a second then disappeared. “Try moving now.”
Sora tried getting up, but he collapsed again and yelled in pain. “It still hurts!”
“Kairi, help me get Sora inside.”
Kairi and Riku carried a pained Sora to the shack and made him set gently on the bed.
“Now let’s see what the problem is,” Kairi told Sora.
She lifted his shirt up and Riku went back to take a look to see the problem.
“Oh my god! What the hell is that?” Riku exclaimed.
“What? What is it?” Kairi went to Riku’s side to see what he saw, but she got up and ran to the bathroom. The boys could hear her hurling. On Sora’s back was a huge blister that swelled up to and looked like a Moogle’s nose. It was caused by him dodging attacks by rolling around all the time.
“What’s on my back?” Sora yelled at Riku. He was panicking; Kairi would never date him again if that was her reaction. “Is it really that bad?”
“Dude, it’s freaking huge!” Riku said. “And something’s oozing out of it, too.”
“Aw man, that’s just gross.”
“Maybe we should… pop it?”
“You’re the only one with a weapon sharp enough to do that, you know?”
“Yeah, I know but this thing has got to go. Ready?”
“Ready.”
Riku summoned his weapon and poked the blister with the wing tip. “Here goes.” He stabbed his keyblade into it and the liquid bursted all over Riku’s face. “Aw, damn. That’s the most disgusting liquid I ever touched!”
Kairi came back out and saw Riku’s face. Her face turned green and she went back into the bathroom.
“I think we should avoid each other for a while,” Sora said.
“Aw man! It’s in my mouth, too!” Riku said as he spat out the vile liquid.

[Destiny]

Oh my god, that's pretty hiliarous, gross but hilarious. Definately keep up on it.

[Answer Man]

lol, that was pretty funny. i like that, make another one cause thats funny

[Blade]

What happens when Riku and Sora spar with Selphie, Tidus, and Wakka? What happens when Riku takes what the Disney Playhouse taught him about cussing seriously?Is Wakka foreign? And what happens when Sora snaps? Three-and-a-half of these questions will be answered in:

Sparring with Selphie, Tidus, and Wakka: one year later

Riku kicked the door open. “Sora!” he called.
Sora looked at Riku and saw that he’s covered in blood and bruises. “Holy crap, Riku! What happened?”
“I need you to partner up with me. I can’t beat Selphie, Tidus, and Wakka alone anymore.”
“They did this to you?! You have a keyblade and can use magic. How could they beat you?”
“Heal me up and go fight them yourself, then you’ll understand.”
“Okay, okay, I’ll go. Heal!” Riku’s wounds disappeared but a few cracking noises could be heard. “What was that?”
“My broken nose. Now com’on!” Sora followed Riku to the spot where the other three were.
“Hey, Sora!” Selphie greeted. “You want to spar with us, too?” She was holding nunchaku.
“Yo, Sora!” Wakka said. “Where have you been all this time?” He still holding a ball, but this one looked more menacing.
“Partnering up with Sora, eh, Riku?” Tidus asked. “We’ll beat you both then!” He was carrying a large sword. “Meet my Caldabolg. This can beat you giant keys any day.”
“See what I mean now, Sora,” Riku said. But there was no reply. “Sora?” He looked behind him where Sora was. Sora was wide-eyed with his mouth hanging open.
“Where have you guys been?” he asked.
“High school,” Tidus answered. “Let’s start.”
Wakka threw the blitzball at Riku, but Sora whacked it away. Tidus came from the left and casted Slowga then went in to bash at Sora. Selphie broke Riku’s nose with a wide and powerful swing.
“Noooot aaaaggaaaiiinnn,” Riku said slowly.
When the magic wore off, Sora casted Curaga on him and Riku. “Holy crap!”
“I know! Now, we need to make a plan and take them out one-by-one.”
“Screw that, we need to do an all around attack!”
“Blitz Ace: Max Velocity!” Selphie, Tidus, and Wakka yelled out.
“You know, we should do something like that, Riku,” Sora said.
“Actually, we might be able to block this attack,”Riku said. “Remember the battle with Xemnas and all those laser beams?”
“Uh, yeah. Which button am I again?”
“Just block the balls.”
Wakka threw up hundreds of blitzballs – “Where does he pull those out anyway?” Sora wondered – and threw a ball to Selphie. She whacked it up high into the air where Tidus somehow jumped. Then Tidus hit the ball hard into one of the other balls. The other balls that were falling were hit by Selphie’s nunchaku and Wakka threw in an occasional blitzing blitzball at Sora and Riku.
Riku and Sora were keeping each other safe by knocking the balls. But then those balls knocked into other balls which would be whacked by Tidus or Selphie and go back towards the duo then repeat.
“This is getting us nowhere,” Riku said.
“I got a plan,” Sora replied. He transformed into Final Form summoning Oathkeeper and Oblivion. “Grab the black one.”
“Don’t be racist, Sora.”
“How is it racist? I just said, ‘Grab the black one.’ Just grab it.”
“Oh, and you call Oathkeeper the white one?”
“No, I’d call it the shiny one.”
“See?”
“See what? Fine, grab the white one then.”
“Oh, now you call it white.”
“I thought you wanted me to call it white. If it bothers you that much, then grab the chocolate one then.”
“What? Can’t you just call it by the weapons’ name?”
Sora used his keyblades to repel all the blitzballs away and make it hit the trio. Then he turned back to normal form and yelled, “Dammit, Riku! Just grab the f****ng keyblade, you a**hole! You’re the f****ng racist one if the word ‘black’ and ‘white’ bothers you that much. I’m just saying to say it faster, you son of a bi-“
“Hey!” Riku yelled back. “Don’t go involving my mom in this!”
“It doesn’t mean your mom. A lot of people say ‘son of a bi-‘”
“Don’t say it!”
“…Bitch.”
“You bastard! I’m gonna kill you!”
“Whoa guys,” Tidus said. “Calm dow-“
“Stay out of this, blondie!” Riku and Sora yelled.
“Okay, that’s just stereotypical. I got a GPA of 4.4.”
“Shut it, pea-brain,” Riku said.
“That’s it. You guys are dead.”
The three began brawling with their fists. “Hey, don’t go killing each other, ya?”
“Shut up, you foreign son of a bi-” Sora began.
“Stop saying that, you urchin!” Riku cut off.
“Oh, come on, ya? Just quit it, ya?” Wakka pleaded.
“We’ve always hated your sh*beep*-y accent!” Riku, Sora, and Tidus yelled.
“Yaaaah’ll dead, you preeks!” And Wakka joined in on the fight.
Kairi walked towards Selphie and asked, “What’s up?”
“The boys are at it again, but with Sora and Riku this time,” she answered.
“Ooh, lucky us I brought popcorn.”

[Zerieth]

Lol. I haz pop corn to. =P

[King of Darkness]

rogfl, Sora Racist. lololol

[The Heartless King]

Those just made my day XD

[Blade]

Well, I think I'll be only to post one a week. I'll try to do as much as I can though.
This will be the first part of the first series in KH Accidents. Sadly, I’m not prepared to post all of the chapters right after another. On the bright side, there will be random short stories in between. Anyway, get ready to enter

School Days

Chapter 1: Kairi’s Alibi

“So, Kairi, this letter of yours is… out of this world,” the principal said. He was a normal guy in his thirties. “I remember the ‘event’ last year, but this one is a bit much.”
“Yeah, but you understand what I’m saying, right?” Kairi asked.
“Not at all. I can understand that our world went inside a wormhole of some sort, but Heartless and No ones?”
“Nobodies,” Kairi corrected.
“Yeah, that too. Anyway, what happened to the guy that kidnapped you?”
“He’s dead.”
“And the organization that he belonged to?”
“All dead, except Roxas. He went inside Sora.”
“…Right. And where is this Sora?”
“He and Riku are taking a look around the island with Tidus and Wakka.”
“Uh-huh. You know, if these two are on this island then they’d have to enroll to school.”
Kairi saw Sora and Riku outside the window with the others.“Yeah, they’ll be coming to here in a few minutes.”
“A few minutes, huh. That won’t leave us much time together.”
“Excuse me?”
“You know,” the principal said strangely. “I’ve always been watching you.” He got up and went around his desk and to the door. “You got good grades, a good attitude, and a great body.” He locked the door.
“Uh, sir, what are you talking about?” she asked nervously. She started to get up from her seat, but the principal pushed her back down.
“Nah-ah-ah. You have been a bad girl, skipping school for weeks. It’s time for your punishment.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Hey, Riku. So the King taught you all that stuff?” Sora asked.
“Yeah. I don’t us to be stuck in class with all the little kids,” Riku said.
“Well, thanks for teaching me too. Who knows, if we’re lucky, we could be in the same class as Kairi.”
“You wish.”
Selphie stepped in between them and said, “Alright guys! The principal’s office is the last door to the left.”
“Thanks, Selphie,” Sora and Riku said. They walked on and tried to open the door, but it was locked.
“Huh, it’s locked,” Riku said. He tried to turn the knob but it wouldn’t budge.
“Wait,” Sora said and shushed Riku. “What’s that sound?”
“Huh. Hey, I can hear it too.” The two put their ear on the door and listened.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Ugh,” Kairi groaned. “It doesn’t fit into my mouth. Please, stop.”
“Then bite it off,” the principal said. “This is your punishment for lying.”
“Ah, no. It’s all over my mouth.”
“Then lick it off, geez. You need to get five more before your done.”
“But if… if Sora finds out, he’ll…”
“I’m sure that ‘Sora’ won’t mind at all.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“What the hell?” Riku said. “What’s going on?”
“Are they…,” Sora tried to say, but he choked up a bit. “We have to save her! I’m gonna kill that guy!”
“I’m with you on that!” The two summoned their keyblade and slammed open the door.
“Let go of Kairi, you…” Sora stopped as he saw what the principal was giving Kairi. She was trying to eat a cream-filled donut, but it exploded when she bit into it.“Donuts?”
“No, Sora! Don’t look at me like this,” Kairi screamed and threw the donut at Sora’s face. Then she ran out the door crying.
“Uh, what were you doing?” Riku asked.
“It’s the punishment I give to girls who are self-conscious about their bodies,” the principal answered. “So you guys are real. Hmm, I should apologize to her later.”
“Yeah… freak.”
“What was that?”
“Nothing. Well, sorry about breaking down your door.”
“Don’t worry about it. Now, since you are residents here, you have to apply for school.”
“Cool. So, where do we sign up?”
“We’ll go to the registration office down the hall. I’ll take you there.”
“Thanks, man.”
As Riku and the principal left, Sora just stood there. He went the door and poked his head out then waited for the two to be out of sight. When they were, he closed the door and picked up Kairi’s donut. He went over to the corner and sat down and started eating the donut.
“Oh, hey, we forgot about Sora,” Riku said to the principal. They went back into the room and found him sitting there, eating the donut. The principal went to tap Sora’s shoulder but Riku stopped him. “No, let him be. The last time he did something like this was when he had Kairi’s shoe. Just back away slowly.”
“Is he gonna be okay?” the principal asked.
“I don’t know, man. I don’t know.”

[Blade]

Sora has a new rival.

Hey, Sora Sister

“Hey, mom,” Sora called through the door of his parents new house.
“Sora?” His mom looked at him like a ghost. She had brown hair and blue eyes. “Is that… really you?”
“Yes, mom. I’m home.”
“Sora!” She jumped at him and hugged him. “Oh, my baby’s back. Honey!” she called to her husband. “Sora’s back.”
A man with the same spiky hair as his son, but blonde, with blue eyes came through the door. “Hey, don’t shout. I just put her back to sleep.”
“But, honey, Sora’s here.”
The man looked at Sora then blinked a few times. “Sora!” He leaped and landed on top of both of them. “You are back! We were worried about you when all we saw was Kairi.”
“Mmmf! Ogh bvvwyng ee!” Sora said. He meant to say, “Dad! You’re killing me!” but he was crushed by the weight of his parents.
The parents sitting on the couch and Sora sitting on an armchair on the opposite side, they talk about Sora’s adventures. He showed them his keyblade as proof when they couldn’t believe his story then continued on.
“And that’s how I came back here,” he finished.
“Wow, so what Kairi said is all true then,” Sora’s mom said.
“Yeah, but we have some bad news for you,” Sora’s dad said grimly. “Follow me and meet your baby sister.”
The family went into a brightly colored room. In the center was a crib with a baby sleeping inside it. Sora went towards it and looked at his sister. She woke up and looked at Sora happily with her bright blue eyes. He picked her up and said,“Aww, she’s cute. What’s her name?”
“Yeah, about that,” his dad said. “Sora.”
“Yeah, dad?” Sora replied.
“No,” Sora’s mom said. “He means the baby.”
“What do you mean?”
“We mean that your sister’s name is Sora.”
“That’s great! You named after me. Thanks so much, guys.”
Sora’s dad sighed from his son’s misunderstanding. “No, Sora. We named her to replace you.”
“…” Sora said nothing.
“…” His parents said nothing.
“…” Sora stayed silent, but he put his sister back into the crib.
“…Uh, Sora? You alright?” his parents asked.
Sora walked out of the house.
“Wait! Where are you going?”
He kept on walking towards the beach then into the water. Then he fell in the ocean in an attempt to drown himself.
“No, Sora!” his dad yelled. He pulled his son up and then they started arguing.
“You thought I was dead?” Sora shouted.
“Well, yeah. You were gone for a year. And when we had Sora, I mean, your sister, we just couldn’t help but think that she’s your rebirth.”
“You thought what!? What’s wrong with you guys?”
“Don’t shout at your parents like that!” Sora’s mom said.
“I don’t wanna hear it, mom! This is too much.”
The family continued arguing. Sora, the baby, crawled out of her crib and looked out the window. When she saw her family arguing she smiled a two-toothed smile. She went to her toy box and took out a Sora, brother, doll and studied it carefully.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`
Sora and his parents went back inside, calmed down. “Well, thanks for letting me stay here,” Sora said.
“No problem, sweetie,” his mom said. “We’re just sorry that we named your sister Sora.”
“Apology accepted.” When they went to the kitchen to get a snack, a doll of Sora was pinned to the wall with a fork in its head. “What the hell?”

[Zero]

Good job